I can’t tell you how long it took me to stop saying “if i’d stayed in my high profile software consulting job five more years I could’ve retired for life.” Financially it was true. But the reality is, I couldn’t have done that and that wasn’t the life I was meant to live. It’s been 20 years and probably took me 16 of them to realize this.
Self-identifying weirdo here. I was scolded in a workplace once for having 'too many' creative pursuits. As if I alone was hoarding all the creativity in the room. Apparently I was only allowed to sew and wasn't permitted to speak on any other topic. Maybe they should have put a memo up in the staff kitchen about that.
I beat around the bush when it came to writing my dream subject. Over the years I tried many different ways to parlay that inclination into something on-trend, marketable and of wider interest. Finally, I realised if I wasn't writing it how I saw it, then I may as well not write at all. There had to be something in it for me, you can't go about the craft of writing chasing trends.
I lamented the fact I was born in the wrong century and longed for a gentler time period. Then I found an artist/writer who literally stitches his own books together and published them start to finish. Right down to securing them into a cover. Okay, that's an idea then. He's very successful at it.
Most of the limits on us creatives are self imposed. I'm learning to take the bliinders off and see more possibilities than just the ones presented by mainstream.
Hi Claire. Well done for finding your way in a world which often isn't gentle. I know another writer who is learning book binding. I think we have a yearning for the more tangible.
This is it. I have always wanted to work with my hands and typing was not enough to satisfy that. I miss craftsmanship in the world it was a great loss.
Thank you! I feel like my best stories are the ones that I’m afraid to tell for fear of “what they’ll think.” I’m looking forward to seeing what happens when I give myself permission to tell the truth. H
When Cali says it’s ok, boy is it ok! I say this because I know what it means to have the complete support of one person. It goes such a long way! Thank you so much for this post ♥️
Thank you for this permission, Cali! It's amazing how we need to receive permission from others, in order to then give it to ourselves. This morning I was thinking how I just want to read and write and do tai chi and lead my book club -- even tho that's not how society tells me I "should" function or can earn a decent living. And yet...somehow I persevere. :)
Hi Lisa. I'm glad to have been there to grant you all the permission you need. I also feel that I am breaking away from the "shoulds" though we do have to make sure that we are earning what we need to live. And we can alter the tangent of that over time.
"Why couldn’t I just knuckle down and continue in my role a software consultant? I was good at it, people respected my skills and if I hadn’t messed around with creative stuff and working part-time for years, I’d have enough money now for a very comfortable early retirement." ---- This is 100% me! It took me a long time to stop saying "if I'd kept that job I had 20 years ago for 5 more years, I'd have been financially independent". It took me years to deeply get it - I COULD NOT have done that. My spirit was dying. That was someone else's path but it I literally could not have done it.
I think my permission slips need to be: You have permission not to be so serious. You have permission to be silly and simple and childlike in the way you think and write. You have permission
Mary Oliver says, "you just have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves". I love that line so much.
Lovely Karen we are so alike! It makes me feel better to know you've had a similar relationship to your job. Ultimately we are stronger for being ourselves rather than trying to fit completely into a box which just won't work.
By the way - You have permission not to be so serious. You have permission to be silly and simple and childlike in the way you think and write. You have permission to be you.
I can’t tell you how long it took me to stop saying “if i’d stayed in my high profile software consulting job five more years I could’ve retired for life.” Financially it was true. But the reality is, I couldn’t have done that and that wasn’t the life I was meant to live. It’s been 20 years and probably took me 16 of them to realize this.
Acceptance can take a long time. It does for me x
Self-identifying weirdo here. I was scolded in a workplace once for having 'too many' creative pursuits. As if I alone was hoarding all the creativity in the room. Apparently I was only allowed to sew and wasn't permitted to speak on any other topic. Maybe they should have put a memo up in the staff kitchen about that.
I beat around the bush when it came to writing my dream subject. Over the years I tried many different ways to parlay that inclination into something on-trend, marketable and of wider interest. Finally, I realised if I wasn't writing it how I saw it, then I may as well not write at all. There had to be something in it for me, you can't go about the craft of writing chasing trends.
I lamented the fact I was born in the wrong century and longed for a gentler time period. Then I found an artist/writer who literally stitches his own books together and published them start to finish. Right down to securing them into a cover. Okay, that's an idea then. He's very successful at it.
Most of the limits on us creatives are self imposed. I'm learning to take the bliinders off and see more possibilities than just the ones presented by mainstream.
Hi Claire. Well done for finding your way in a world which often isn't gentle. I know another writer who is learning book binding. I think we have a yearning for the more tangible.
This is it. I have always wanted to work with my hands and typing was not enough to satisfy that. I miss craftsmanship in the world it was a great loss.
Thank you! I feel like my best stories are the ones that I’m afraid to tell for fear of “what they’ll think.” I’m looking forward to seeing what happens when I give myself permission to tell the truth. H
I'm looking forward to seeing what stories you write too with that permission.
When Cali says it’s ok, boy is it ok! I say this because I know what it means to have the complete support of one person. It goes such a long way! Thank you so much for this post ♥️
You are most welcome. I'm glad it hit the spot
Thank you for this permission, Cali! It's amazing how we need to receive permission from others, in order to then give it to ourselves. This morning I was thinking how I just want to read and write and do tai chi and lead my book club -- even tho that's not how society tells me I "should" function or can earn a decent living. And yet...somehow I persevere. :)
Hi Lisa. I'm glad to have been there to grant you all the permission you need. I also feel that I am breaking away from the "shoulds" though we do have to make sure that we are earning what we need to live. And we can alter the tangent of that over time.
"Why couldn’t I just knuckle down and continue in my role a software consultant? I was good at it, people respected my skills and if I hadn’t messed around with creative stuff and working part-time for years, I’d have enough money now for a very comfortable early retirement." ---- This is 100% me! It took me a long time to stop saying "if I'd kept that job I had 20 years ago for 5 more years, I'd have been financially independent". It took me years to deeply get it - I COULD NOT have done that. My spirit was dying. That was someone else's path but it I literally could not have done it.
I think my permission slips need to be: You have permission not to be so serious. You have permission to be silly and simple and childlike in the way you think and write. You have permission
Mary Oliver says, "you just have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves". I love that line so much.
Great line - soft animal :)
Lovely Karen we are so alike! It makes me feel better to know you've had a similar relationship to your job. Ultimately we are stronger for being ourselves rather than trying to fit completely into a box which just won't work.
By the way - You have permission not to be so serious. You have permission to be silly and simple and childlike in the way you think and write. You have permission to be you.
I love Karen’s gentle humour in her posts. It is uniquely her and I look forward to it